Funk Stew Recipe

While I was away in la la land, skipping and singing la la's... I basically lived off of this amazing stew that really satisfied my ravenous hunger.  I actually became a HUGE fan of this recipe, so much in fact, that I ate it for breakfast, lunch and dinner.  I never got tired of it.  Ever.  Perhaps it could use a little tweaking, and I'm sure there are a few substitutions that could be made here and there... but for the most part, it's perfect just as it is.  On a cold, rainy, windy, gloomy night, go ahead and make this for yourself.

FUNK STEW:

1 TSP of internalized rage (substitute with depression)

1 cup of WTF... Really?

1 cup of bewildered confusion

2 TBLSPN of loss of control

2.5 cups of severe social anxiety

8 oz. of endless analyzation

**you may add a good old fashioned pour of Vinegar, to increase the bitterness to mouth puckering "holy pucker batman" level.

*Additional notes/ variations for recipe: (thanks to some friends adding their $.02)

- Internalized rage solidifies into depression if you let it sit too long. (JW)

- A little Maylox may be helpful if you suffer from acid reflux and or bitterness. (EM)

- Garnish with a hearty dash of hopelessness and serve it w/ a bottle of Jack. (LH)

- Add an extra fifteen minutes of aggression and tantrum-ing. (W)

Mix the above together with a few dashes of fruitless worry and a handful of bullsh**.  Stir until all the ingredients form a hard unmoving ball of impossible-ness.  This dish is best suited as the main course of a formal dinner, and be sure to serve politely with a fork, knife, and white linen cloth.