Fibro-MY-al-WHAT?

FIBROMYALGIA: When a bullet in the head feels better than water on your skin.

On any given day you will find me walking around with an attitude like everything is a pain in my a**, and just about anything gets on my nerves... constantly.  What I didn't realize is that I actually have a condition that is CAUSING this, and its not just an attitude adjustment problem.  Much to the dismay of my husband, I'm sure.

Side note: to all you PITA's out there,  I feel you... and join you whole heartedly in sticking your tongue out to the others who have so insensitively labeled us as malcontents, annoying POS's and just plain over sensitive.

What is Fibromyalgia, you ask?  Its a complex overactive and hypersensitive nerve disorder that causes intense nerve and muscle pain in addition to a host of other awesomely fun poo.  In the most laymen terms I will attempt to explain it to you in my "Abbie Nourmel" way...

It's a stabbing your whole body with nerve knives from hell, achy muscle, GI leaking, stomach bloating, tired as effing sh**, might be walking with crutches soon, can't stand longer than five minutes, feeling like you have mononucleosis, brain fog-wait are you still talking, cognitive skill lessening to the point you sound like a bumbling idiot, concentration negating - what did you say again?, ripping away others hands because light touch feels like razor blades on skin, sensory overload, opening your eyes lets in so much light it makes you feel like you're a vampire, you can hear ants fart and smell them too from a mile away, doubling over abdominal pain, finger and toe numbing/ tingling, restless leg feeling, migraine creating, anxiety inducing and feeling like you're a cast out zombie in your own private 8th circle of hell disease.

It's AWESOME.  Did I mention it's incurable?  I'm totally pumped.  Just having one incurable disease (Asthma) DEFINITELY wasn't enough to deal with.  I totally wanted another one... because my endometriosis and PCOS are just too grumpy to be good playmates.  You know, in case Fibromyalgia gets lonely, it will have someone to play with.  Good times.